Don't Call the SPCA on Me

I have this theory that I can wash dishes in the washing machine. I mean, maybe not the stemware or the fine china, but the tupperware at least should be fine.

Really, you should be able to wash anything in the washing machine. That's why it's called a "washing machine." Not a "clothes-washing machine," or a "textile-washing machine." Just a washing machine. If it needs washed, put it in the machine.

90% of getting things clean is hot water, anyway. Let the Brownian motion do the work. How's that for better living through physics?

"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." -- Benjamin Franklin

In the vitamin aisle of our local co-op is a supplement made from blue-green algae called BrainON, which purports to enhance one's mental acuity and function.

A few aisles over is a much more popular supplement made from plant matter and fungi which ought to be called BrainOFF, and which is scientifically proven to do just the opposite.

Child Labor Laws Have Ruined this Country

I let the neighbor girls wash my car today. They came to my door with their little business proposal, and I said yes.

They didn't do a very good job, but it was only 5 bucks* and it's rare that one gets to enjoy both supporting child labor and paying someone less than minimum wage.


*I gave them $6, actually, so they could easily split it evenly between the three of them. So perhaps I did pay them minimum wage after all, if they worked for 15 minutes or less. I wasn't really keeping track.

Not Just Moving the Stickers Around

My husband, who can solve the Rubik's Cube, noted that you can tell by the Cube sitting on the shelf whether there's someone in the house who can solve it or not. If there isn't, the Cube will sit in perpetual chaos. In contrast, if there is someone in the household who can solve the Cube, they invariably find that disarray unbearable and thus the Cube in such a house will always be found with its sides six uninterrupted solids.

The results of my repeated experiments, albeit on a very small sample of solvers, have shown this to be true; the unsolved Cube is something the solver can tolerate for no more than a few hours.

Gifted Actors

We are, most of us, acting all the time. Socially, so much of what we say and do and how we say and do it is false and contrived. This is by no means a bad thing. This is what allows most social transactions to go smoothly and uneventfully.

Some are better at this acting than others.

What does it mean to be a good actor?

It means that one's will dictates the emotions one shows. Feelings do not have to actually be felt to be expressed; they can be chosen. Actions, expressions, inflections that are considered to be unintentional are, for the natural actor, all quite intentional. And the actor can be left wondering what of what they say and do is genuine and what isn't.